A Love Affair...of the Coffee Sort

Coffee. The composi-tion of those 6 letters creates the center of my adulthood love affair. Dramatic? Perhaps. Inaccurate? No. Who would have ever thought you could take some hard, nasty inedible green beans, throw them in fire, smash them to pieces and then drink the liquid that comes from soaking those nearly burned little buggers in hot water? But, someone did it once, and...here we are!

And so, I succumb, time and again, to its powers. The black liquid gold...bringing with it a little more energy, a little more motivation, and yes, a little more 'happy'. I think more than those things though, is a taste of the familiar, a taste of comfort, if there can be one.

Being the busy girl that I am, with kids, babysitting more kids, going to work, cleaning, cooking, laundry, and on and on...all the time, I have more to think about than coffee...right?? But, it's there, like a little subliminal message, with its little tiny coffee voice shouting, "Coffee! Coffee!"

If you're a coffee-er, you have your coffee 'spots' and your coffee drinks...ya know, THE drink. When we're not drinking it, we wish we were. These days for me it's the Iced Americano. Throw a little peanut butter syrup (oh, don't knock it till you've tried it!) and some cream in there, and it's divine!

But then there's the issue of money, so in efforts to be more FRUGAL, as my blog is so fondly named, my husband and I have finally given in to the home espresso brewing system! (I suppose the ultimate frugal move would be to stop drinking coffee altogether - *gasp* - but this is much more fun...) It's the Saeco Odea Giro Super Automatic Espresso Machine, designed by BMW DesignworksUSA. Oh, it's not as fancy (or expensive) as it sounds, and we even went with a refurbished model, but oh man...talk about fun!

And now, I have unlimited caffeine at my fingertips ...

oh, the love affair continues!

A Tribute

It's that time of year again. Time has flown and slowed all at once these last 10 years. He died on June 28, 2000. June 12 was his birthday, June 8 was my parents anniversary and of course...Father's Day. It's that time of year again. I miss my dad.

The ache has quieted. I think that now his memory bears an almost sweet taste to it. When he comes to mind, it's not painful as much as it is pleasant. Although sometimes looking at my daughters I get that tinge again, 'if only he could have met them...'. Or, I still get the occasional, 'I knew your dad. He was a great man'. I think, 'Yep. You have no idea.' Of course, its easy to forget all the bad in remberence of one lost. That is how it should be, I think. But the crazy thing about my dad is that there wasn't much bad.

He was a journalist who gave up his career to work at a church, writing and serving and ministering to others. He invested in the lives of people, not things. He re-heated and ate the leftovers that no-one else would. He made jumping off a fallen lightpost seem like the best thing ever, simply by making it a 'mystery ride' - if there was no money for a real family outing. He loved music and so badly played it, but he played it with heart and gusto and with us on his knee. He read the Bible to my brother and sister and I, and taught us what it meant. He planted and tended to his garden, rode his bike to work and would fast and pray for days at times. And most importantly, he loved my mom.

And who could forget the awful little rusty light blue pick-up with the flashing yellow light on top? He led such a simple life, but I think it was more powerful than so many realized at the time. He didn't live for himself, but truly lived life for others. His wife and kids and so many more than I could count.

And he will, forever, remain a part of me. Cliche ~ until I look at the crook in my nose, my gigantic veins (the nurses are always impressed!), the gray hair at age 30, and my ability to write and ponder and innovate. I am left to remember him as hints of my own self. The other, more selfless parts, I am working on!

And God, in His goodness and perfect timing, gave me my husband not long before he died. Passionate, yet practical, the ever-constant love of my life. So patient and hard-working. Almost a fierceness to his kindness. Perfect for me. I'm certain my girls will remember their childhood daddy with the same fondness that I do mine.

Whenever I am tempted to feel sorry for myself in losing my dad, my safety net, I am given harsh reminders of the blessing I had, and even still have. Recently, in working with Beacon Hill, I have had the humbling privilege of getting to know some amazing single mothers and their children, whose fathers have either abused them or long forgotten them. They do not have the memory of safety and peace with a loving father. In these moments of facing stark reality, the ache is stronger. The ache of never having, being so much more harsh than the ache of loss.

I am thankful for my dad. I am thankful for my amazing husband and my wonderful father-in-law. I am realizing that I have been given much in the way of fathers. I am reminded that "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." Luke 12:48. There exists a weight of responsibility on the 'father-rich' (those whose dad-cup is full) to step in the gap for those without fathers.

"For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality, and accepts no bribes. He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing. And you are to love those who are aliens, for you yourselves were aliens in Egypt." Deut. 10:17-19.

Daunting, but fortunately, we have a Heavenly Father who shows abounding mercy, never-ending love, showers of grace and IS the perfect Father that we so desperately need. Our job is only easy if we ourselves experience God as our Father, and then...we simply reflect.

Friends

When I write, I like to try to write from a place of inspiration. A good thing, I suppose, when one of my goals in writing is not just a great pastime, but hopefully helping someone else find inspiration too. Lately, with summer and all, we've been just busy! It's good, summer-type busy, but still busy. It becomes so easy for me to get lost in our world of going with the flow and jumping from one thing to the next...hence the fewer blog posts!

Today, though, I am feeling inspired. I was at church observing all my beautiful friends. And all at once, I felt it again. That feeling of being humbled and grateful and left feeling just utterly blessed. It's a common feeling lately, and I think that I am coming to appreciate friends and a truer community in a way I haven't before.

We went to Hope, Alaska with many of these friends last weekend. We so enjoyed being together and even watching our children, who will all grow up together, just having fun and getting dirty and being with the kids they have known since they were born. It just kept hitting me, this feeling that kept bubbling up. Gratitude.

Then, the other night I went to dinner with my best girls. Birthdays are always our excuse to go out! The laughter, both irreverent and sincere, the confiding and sharing, and always making our poor waitress angry for staying too late, half of us ordering just a salad or dessert! It's these things I cherish. And again, I'm humbled, grateful, blessed.

'True' community, I'm not really sure what that looks like. But I think we're getting closer than we have ever been. 'To bear each other's burdens' as was said from the pulpit today. I think that's where this community is found. We don't have to live together to accomplish this, but we have to be active in each other's lives. Choosing to share in the joys and pains, and it is a choice. At the cost of our own comfort at times.

Those folks in the very early church in Acts were on to something I think... "All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved," Acts 2:44-47.

I realize that at this time in history, God was beginning the miraculous work of growing His church. However, this type of living worked for growing a church! A community of people devoted to each other and to God, giving to each other as anyone had need. They were together and they were glad! I think we need more of this.

But for now, I'm grateful.

I hesitated writing this because I know many people don't have these type of friendships or community. All I can say is that like so many things, its a choice. You have to choose to give and invest in people. Count the cost and then simply BE a friend. I think loneliness spurs us to risk sometimes. I know it does for me. Take the risk! And you too, could someday be part of a ridiculous pyramid built of middle-aged women!

Photos courtesy of Rhae Anne Etheredge , except for photo of 6 friends, courtesy of Suite 100 hostess.