Quicken, Friend or Foe?

Me and Quicken, we have a thing. I think we could be friends if I was super fantastic with money. But I'm not, so we are not too friendly. Sometimes I fool myself into thinking we're friends...we get to know each other a little better and then...ouch! Again, not really friends at all.

There are some things I'm really good at. A lot of things I do right. But my husband and I - I'm reluctant to say - not really good with money. I could probably pinpoint some childhood issues or learned habits, behavioral patterns or spiritual connetations. But the simple fact remains.

Our path through the wilderness of broke-ness (or brok-EN-ness) is well worn. We have been around the bend a few times and I suspect we are not done going around it. Clearly, God wants us to be good stewards of our money, and we are struggling through that. What I'm wondering about tonight, though, is this path.

What is it with these paths of difficulty that we hit? The remorse or desperation or thoughts of, "God, can we just catch our breath, catch a break?" can be overwhelming. But when the fog clears and I look back at the mucky mess, I'm certain I see glimmers of something beautiful... humility, patience, self-control, hope or even possibly, could it be...joy!? And so here I am, wondering... can these things be learned in the absence of difficulty?

I've said it before...I am no expert on this matter, or any matter, for that matter! But I do want to encourage some of you, whose path is not easy. For the heavy-laden, the broken-hearted or weary friends, I want to say something. In the midst of difficulty, in the muddy, nasty mucky mess...or even the little tiny mess...whatever it is, keep your eyes open for the jewels hidden there. Don't be tempted to wish for it gone! I dare you to take the risk and give up...you will not regret it. And when you've come to the end of yourself, you have come to the perfect place. When you are finally done with trying your very best, Jesus can finally step in and make right what went wrong. Pride can't survive here. Lust can't survive here. Self-centeredness can't survive here. Poverty...it can't even survive here.

There is so much to hope for. But the nature of our path, I don't know that it will ever be easy. And to wish and pray for an easy path...well, that's what I'm pondering. I'm questioning the hope and prayer that we make, that won't life just get easier? If my path feels wide and easy and lovely...then isn't something very wrong? Do I hope and plan for prosperity? Absolutely. Shoot for health, happiness and love? No doubt. Can I be fulfilled beyond words? Thank God, yes. Will my life be lived on a big-wide-shiney-not hard path? Not a chance.

Just consider the thought. Maybe you agree, maybe not. These are ponderings...

As for us, we are getting better with money, little by little. Thanks to God's grace, Dave Ramsey, sheer determination and a plan. Quicken and I, we will come to terms. Choosing to share our 'stuff' only lends to the fact that NONE of us are exempt from difficulty or hardship or consequences, no matter what. And through it all, what I'm finding is of utmost importance, is that we come to terms with the nature of the path itself.